Precious

There was a guy in his 20s affected by Cerebral Palsy, wheelchair-bound and had come in to us with severe pneumonia. His heart was beating faster and faster, his temperature falling and the oxygen in his blood creeping down slowly. You could tell that things would only get worse from here. I could foresee him struggling to breathe very soon. We started stepping up to the plate. I took it upon myself to start the hardest part of my job. Trying to break bad news. That too, to a mother.

She was one of the most calm and collected people I'd ever seen. Trying to understand the situation and possibly denying the seriousness at the same time. She'd nod to what I'd say to her and then look at her son longingly. Things happened at quite a fast pace then. I had to say,"We have to make a decision now." And then.....I heard the most heart-wrenching 'Mera bacha' (My baby) from this woman struggling to put on a brave face all this time. She clutched him, lay with him on the gurney and started wailing, 'Mera bacha'....

I have to say, I have experienced this multiple times. Every time, my heart sinks and I have to struggle to hold my tears back. Outside was lying this boy's chair that he'd sat in all his life. It was brought in to make him feel comfortable. I was having nightmares thinking that this woman is now going to have to get used to seeing this chair empty. How painful can life get? How hard it is to let go...

How lucky we are to get a chance to hold someone's hand in such delicate times....

May he enjoy the pleasures of heaven. May she smile at the thought...

I Fall in Love too Easily

Just recently I had 'Sesame Prawn skewers' at Tampopo in the Trafford Centre Manchester. There was this flavour that I could not recognize. Tangy, zingy, citrus, sour....it was exciting! Mixed with it was some ginger and toasted sesame seeds. I fell in love instantly!

A few weeks after, I decided to raid Chinatown in Manchester. It was high time. I wanted authenticity in my kitchen.

I started off with Ken Hom's recipes. I have about 5 of his most famous books. My first experiment was with beef. For a hardcore Pakistani like myself, stir-fried beef is tricky business. We despise the rubbery consistency of partially-cooked beef. For us it is undercooked and inedible. I had to think about adding a Pakistani twist to Ken Hom's creation so I got me thinking cap on!

FRAGRANT STIR-FRIED BEEF WITH PEPPERS

INGREDIENTS

• Beef steak (pasande)- 500 gm


• Fresh lemon grass- 2 stalks (cut into 2 inch pieces and crush)


• Red and green capsicum/ Bell pepper- 1/2 each


• Peanut/groundnut oli- 3 tbsp


• Finely chopped ginger- 1 tbsp


• Thinly sliced shallots- 100gm


• Thinly sliced garlic cloves- 3


• Light soy sauce- 1 tbsp


• Salt- to taste


• Freshly ground black pepper- 1/2 tsp


• Sugar- 1 tsp


• Sesame oil- 2 tsp

MARINADE

• Light soy sauce- 2tbsp


• Sesame oil- 2tsp


• Cornstarch/cornflour- 2 tsp


• Meat tenderizer- 1 tbsp

Cut the beef into thin strips about 2 inches long. Marinate in the above for 1 hour. Adding the tenderizer is the Pakistani twist to this recipe. It works!

Now heat the wok and add peanut oil. When smoking hot, add the beef without the marinade. Fry on high heat until it browns. I add an extra step at this stage. I turn down the flame and simmer the beef on

low heat for 15 minutes. This is how it gets really juicy and tender. Take the beef out.

Make sure to thinly slice the garlic, shallots and ginger. Lemon grass should be crushed to release the flavour.

Add the lemon grass, garlic, ginger and shallots to the wok. Stir-fry for a few seconds before adding the bell peppers.

Time to add some colour to the dish now. Add the peppers, soy sauce, salt, black pepper and sugar and continue to stir-fry.

Add the beef now, give it a quick mix and spoon in the sesame oil. Toss to coat evenly and then dish out. I served it with sticky rice. And then I tasted it and that tangy flavour was right there! Aah lemon grass! How did, how could I not know?!

Ignorance is no bliss.

Expanding My Repertoire

There are a few things in life that remind you of good times i.e. childhood. For me one such reminder is Lebanese food. We grew up eating Shawarma, Toum, Houmous, Khubz, Arayes-el-kafta etc. I reminisce about life in the Middle East whenever I get to taste this amazingly aromatic and delicious cuisine. Such mild yet luxurious flavour. I think about my dad and his obsession with Arayes-el-kafta, his expert replication of all the different types of food he used to love.

I thought I'd share with you my take on Lebanese cuisine tonight. I tried my hand at their Lamb kafta. For a long time I've been trying to make it perfect. Mellow yet flavourful. I went to my butcher's early morning after a night shift. I got the freshest meat ever as a result. He advised me to get minced lamb shoulder and not leg if I want to make kababs. His point was that shoulder meat has more fat in it and it keeps the kababs moist. He, of course, was spot-on!

LEBANESE LAMB KAFTA

INGREDIENTS

• Minced lamb shoulder meat- 500gm


• Salt- to taste


• Coriander powder (Pisa dhanya)- 1 tsp*


• Cumin powder (Pisa zeera)- 1 tsp*


• Garlic- 4 cloves


• Onion- 2: Slice one onion and fry it till golden, leave the other one raw


• Cinnamon powder (Pisi daarcheeni)- 1/4 tsp*


• Garam masala- 1/2 tsp*


• Flat leaf parsley- 1 tbsp


• Olive oil- to shallow fry

Put all the seasonings, garlic, onions, parsley and minced meat in a grinder and grind together.

*Instead of using the cumin, coriander, garam masala and cinnamon powders, you can simply add a tablespoon of Lebanese 'Baharat' powder. It is a spice mix that has ground allspice, cinnamon, black peppercorns, cloves, cumin, coriander, cardamom, nutmeg and paprika.

Now make medium-sized meatballs, thread into wooden skewers (pre-soaked in cold water for a few hours) and shape into oblong kaftas around them. Wet your palms slightly to give them a smooth surface.

Shallow fry in olive oil on medium flame to keep these kaftas moist.

Serve with houmous, toum, cucumber yoghurt, minty salad and warm Pita bread. I was too tired therefore served it over rice. Works for me since Zaf loves rice. You can make pita pockets out of these as well. I loved these and after several attempts, I finally got the ratio right. Would love to know what you think. Happy cooking to you!

Survival Of The Fittest

Finished my 1st set of night duties as an RMO 2 Acute Medicine yesterday. RMO 2 is a sorry sight since he/she has to complete unfinished jobs in 18 wards, help the House Officer, clerk new patients, respond to peri-arrest calls and hold the crash bleep; picture me in scrubs with 2 bleeps on me that increase to 4 at 6:30 am, I felt smothered.

In the morning you join the post-take rounds which may end as late as 10:15 am. I then drive 20 miles back home trying my best to not sleep at the wheel (trust me I have done it :( ). I have to say I was lucky to be working with an excellent bunch of girls though and loved cribbing together. What doesn't break you, makes you! It felt wonderful at the end to conquer such an inundating task.

I was so ecstatic to survive that I celebrated with cooking up a feast yesterday: Lebanese Lamb Kafta with roasted Pita chips! Turned out YUM! I have posted the recipe in my next entry.

Since I promised my friends that I would cook and post a recipe to my blog today, here we go! I'd cooked this one up over the weekend in my Haandi (clay pot) and it was just too good. Very earthy creation. You can use whatever pot you like.

MURGH MASALA

INGREDIENTS

Chicken (bone-in) cut into 8 pieces-0.75kg

MARINADE

• Beaten yoghurt-3/4 cup


• Freshly ground black pepper-1 tsp


• Salt-to taste

SPICY PASTE

• Peeled Ginger-1 inch piece


• Garlic cloves-6


• Medium-sized onions-2


• Whole cumin (zeera)-1tbsp


• Whole dried red chillies-10

GARNISH

• Lemon slices


• Fresh coriander (Hara dhanya)


• Julienned ginger (Bareek kati adrak)

TEMPERING/BAGHAAR

• Vegetable oil-1/2 cup


• Whole garam masala (whole mixed spices): 10 black peppercorns (kaali mirch), 1 cinnamon stick (Daarcheeni), 3 cloves (laung), 1 black cardamom (bari ilaichi).

Coarsely pound the black peppercorns and add to the chicken alongwith yoghurt and salt. Leave to marinate for 30 minutes.

Dry roast the cumin and red chillies on low flame until fragrant

and then pound coarsely in a mortar and pestle. You could use a coffee grinder too but the spices
get slightly burnt in the process. Besides I like to put all my love into my meals.

Now pound together the garlic, onion, ginger, red chillies and cumin together to a thick paste. Don't worry if the consistency is not smooth. It tastes even better with partially ground ingredients. You can use a blender if you want. My theme for the day was 'earthy'.

This is how my paste looked like after a few patient minutes.

Crackle the whole garam masala in hot oil.

Now add the paste to the oil and stir on medium-high heat for 4-5 minutes.

Add the chicken with the marinade, mix well and

cook on low-medium heat for 10-20 minutes until the water evaporates and oil floats to the top.

Now uncover and stir quickly on high flame. Once the consistency of the gravy is nice and thick (4-5 minutes),

dish it out and garnish with julienned ginger and finely chopped coriander.

Ideally this should be served with chapati/paratha but I took an easy way out and served it over boiled rice. It was just too good. In case you were wondering, this is from a cookbook with some tweaking and tailoring :).

I will eagerly wait for your responses. Goodbye till the next post!

Slow but Steady

The essence of happiness, I think, is enthusiasm. To learn, to meet new people, to observe, to reflect. What contributes to happiness is positivity, persistence and giving everyone the benefit of doubt except your own selves. To acknowledge every single person around you for what they've taught you, for the time they've spent with you. To accept that one's viewpoints change with time and nothing is set in stone. To make no claims whatsoever.
I think cynicism keeps one unhappy. How can you be at peace with yourself while busy noticing someone else's imperfections? It's emotionally exhausting.
All the while, it's difficult to be positive when going through a rough patch. If you are being abused or criticized round-the-clock, how will you muster the strength to not displace it to the next person? But that, my friend, is the test. That is where your own personality kicks in. If one is able to keep hope alive while being hit at, she/he in my opinion is an example for humanity. From Prophet Muhammad (PBUH) to Nelson Mandela, humanity survived only due to persistence. Positive perseverance. He swore at me but I 'chose' to smile at him. It was much less exhausting than swearing back and living with the consequences. But what it took was a pause to absorb what had happened and to 'actively' think how to react. Not just react out of an impulse. That's easy and that's why the majority does it. Without giving it any thought.
Keep doing it, it'll take VERY long but one day you'll reap the rewards. You'll smile forever. Contain your tongue when angry and you'll find the secret to the highest levels of bliss.
To happiness!

میرا اللہ اور میرے اللہ کے بندے

میرا اللہ بڑا فراخ دل ہے۔ میرے اللہ کے ہاں ہر گناہ کی معافی ہے سواءے شرک کے۔
میرا اللہ اپنے بندوں سے اتنی محبت کرتا ہے کہ اگر کؤی اس کے بندے کا دل دکھا دے تو جب تک اس بندے سے معافی نہیں ملتی، اللہ سے بھی نہیں مل پائیگی۔
میرے اللہ کے بندوں کا معاملہ ذرا مختلف ہے۔ کبھی کبھی تو ایسا بھی ہوتا ہے کہ موت کے بعد بھی ان کے ہاں سے معافی نہیں ملتی۔ اس بات سے بھی دل نہیں پگھلتا کہ اس کے اس ایک عمل سے کسی پر آیا عذاب ٹل سکتا ہے۔ کسی کی زندہ رہتے ہوءے تڑپ ختم ہو سکتی ہے۔
میرے اللہ کا بندہ اپنے آپ کو اللہ سے بڑا سمجھتا ہے شاید۔ جبھی تو وہ اپنا دل بڑا نہیں کر پاتا۔ یا پھر یہ جھجک ہے۔
سب مٹی میں مل جائیگا۔
سب ٹھاٹھ پڑا رہ جائیگا۔
میرے اللہ کے بندوں، مجھے معاف کر دینا۔ جو میں نے نادانی میں دل دکھایا یا کچھ ہونے کے زعم میں، یا پھر انجانے میں۔
میرے اللہ کے بندوں، ایک محبت کی نظر کی بھیک دے دیناایک مسکراہٹ کا صدقہ کر دینا، صرف اور صرف اپنے اللہ کے لئیے۔ کیا پتہ تم جس سے ناراض ہو، وہ اللہ کا محبوب ہو

Pakistan raped on 2nd May 2011

No matter how much I try to digress, deny and pretend that it's all well, it keeps hurting. Pakistan is much like it's daughter "Mukhtaran Mai". It was gang-raped by Zardari and co., Obama and his seals and perhaps OBL and yet the criminals are roaming around freely, stomping on it's bosom. My country still breathes.
After my stay in USA, I fell in love with the country and it's people. The real America, where dreams come true. The American people, majority of whom don't judge you by your religion or appearance (true atleast for Boston), who stand up for the truth. But this is not true for the US government as is known. The number of times they've changed their story about Op Geronimo-EKIA is amazing. But since they are the masters, who has the courage to challenge them. Whatever details are inconsistent or conflicting will be scoffed upon and brushed under the carpet with the label "conspiracy theory".
And then Zardari and co., who think providing an explanation to the Washington Post is all that is required. The Pakistani people, "Ah never mind, they can take anything and everything!". It's true. I for one, don't have the courage to protest consistently (as yet). I dream about starting a hunger strike and then laugh at myself. I don't have the courage Allama Iqbal once prayed for his people to have. Why should I criticize others. I keep on living a full life...

As Iqbal prayed:
جوانوں کو میری آہ سحر دے
پھر ان شاہیں بچوں کو بال و پر دے
خدایا آرزو میری یہی ہے
مرا نور بصیرت عام کر دے

where he asked God to bless his children with wings and his vision; I pray that God accepts his prayer.